With closed eyes

Because Megan wasn’t feeling great last night and went to bed early, I volunteered to be on late night baby duty. Wouldn’t you know that our little guy woke up twice, once at midnight and then again around 4:15. As I began to feed him, it struck me as odd to see how awake he was, his blue eyes wide open, looking at me and at the fan above. Both times I thought to myself, ‘he’s not going to fall back asleep’. What was amazing was that he was wide-eyed for the first seven ounces of both bottles, but when it got down to that final ounce, his eyes began to slowly shut. It was as if he knew it was time to close his eyes. I wonder if it is something innate in a child, that he or she knows that the end of the bottle is coming and it is time to go back to sleep. I’m sure there are parents out there that would scoff at such a question, whose kids never go quietly into the night. But not our little man, he knew exactly when to close his eyes.

As I was witnessing this last night, especially at 4:15 (it’s amazing what I think about in the middle of the night, when my sleep is interrupted), I began to think about when I know to close my eyes. Over the last two weeks in our worship service, I have been so moved by the music we have been singing, that I have actually closed my eyes while singing praise to our Living God. I am not one of those people who loses themselves in the worship services. I rarely close my eyes and even more rarely do I lift my hands in praise. I don’t have anything against people who do that, it’s just not me. But the last two weeks, at some point in the service, there I was singing with my eyes closed.

Here’s the thing, my son closes his eyes as he becomes full of formula from the bottle. He knows the exact amount he needs and as he gets to the point of comfort, he relaxes allowing him to drift off into sleep. In our worship services the last two weeks, I believe that I have become full of the Spirit, allowing me to relax, to be comfortable and to fully worship God. It’s taken a long time and a lot of prayer to get our great little church to this point. We finally have a musician who knows what he is doing and is passionate and connected and modern, as well as having a heart for the tradition of the church. With God’s help, it will continue, and maybe we all can close our eyes a little more often, and maybe my son will start sleeping through the night.