Just as he came into my life quickly, in a whirlwind of emotions, he also left me. The story goes like this: Mid-way through the second semester of my second year in divinity school at Duke, I received an additional amount of money that had been left over from a scholarship. Having school already paid for the semester, and being young and naïve about money, I did what any 23 year-old would want to do with money, to spend it. Having come out of a pretty tough relationship several months before, I had turned my attention for looking for a new best friend, one that would be far less trouble than a significant other. I had been on-line for about two weeks looking for a dog through a local adoption agency. Then the check came in the mail. I thought it was fortuitous. I had looked at the profile of a certain cute little dog named Kodiak about a million times. I’d look at other dogs, but I kept coming back to him. I finally got the nerve up to submit an on-line survey that requested information about him. The same morning that I sent in the form, the call from the foster parents came. It was the Friday before Spring Break, a break that I was using to come home for a week, just to relax. I thought to myself, what would be the harm to go and take a look. The couple allowed me to come and visit on Saturday so that I could meet Kodi before I made any kind of decision. Knowing nothing about a dog other than that I really wanted one, I consulted a good friend of mine to come along. She had a dog and knew a thing or two about dogs having grown up with them. My family had only ever had cats, so I was thankful for an educated friend to accompany me in my visit. As we pulled up to the house, I gave her very specific instructions. “You are to NOT allow me to get this dog. We are only here on a scouting mission. No matter what, you are to tell me to wait, and not to make any kind of decision about this dog.” My good friend that day, named Megan, who is now my wife, failed miserably to fulfill her part of the bargain. It was love at first site, looking back, for both of us. At the time, she never could have known what she herself was getting into. But I’m sure she doesn’t regret it in the least. Kodi, as we came to call him, was an adorable four-month old, 25 pound bundle of joy. He bounced around without a care in the world. He interacted well with the couple's other dogs and played with us as complete strangers. The only problem was that I was leaving the next day to come home for a week. The couple was also preparing to take him to one of those adopt-a-pet shows where he would have definitely been adopted. The couple agreed to take care of him for one more week if I promised to come get him as soon as I returned to Durham. The deal was done and I was the owner of new dog.
For six plus years, Kodi was my companion on a journey that I could not have gone on alone. He was with me through the ups and downs of Divinity School, through graduation, through my first appointment in Sumter, through our wedding, through my move back to Columbia, and everywhere in between. He sat on my bed with me on more than one occasion and comforted me as I cried. He endured a strict training program that lasted two months, but left him as one very well trained dog, not just on the leash, but through spoken words and hand signals. He even knew a little bit of Spanish and could spell, O-U-T and W-A-L-K. He loved to go on walks and down to the river, where he would run and play in the water. He dealt well with being a blended family, living with Megan’s dog Brooks and endured us adopting his little brother Durham. He even saw us bring home Isaac, although he was never really fond of him. He never really bonded with him like I thought he would, although I now know why. Over the last few months Kodi lost most of his energy. I thought he was just adjusting to a new life with a baby, but it turns out that he had developed cancer. He had lost a lot of weight over the last few days it seemed, so we took him to the vet. The news was rough. We could put him through surgery and the hell of chemotherapy, but it would only buy him another 4 to 6 months. Even then, he would be hurting. We made the decision yesterday to have him put to sleep.
You hear the term to describe dogs all the time, Man’s Best Friend. I’ve never given it a second thought, until now. I am realizing more and more that one’s heart is made up of people, and in my case and in many other’s, pets. And you don’t realize how much you love them, how much they mean to you until they are gone, and you are left with a little hole in your heart. My heart has a hole in it. Right now, it is big. Over time, it will grow smaller. But it will always be there. I thank God that for six plus years I had Kodi as my companion. He taught me what it was to be an adult, to think of someone or something other than myself, and gave me great practice in becoming a father. Just as he came into my life quickly, in a whirlwind of emotions, he also left me. I love you and I will miss you Kod-man. You were the BEST!
