It seems that all the world is chiming in right now with their thoughts about the death of Osama Bin Laden. While my feelings are by no means unique, one of the only ways I know to express them is through the written word. Twitter and Facebook statuses do not provide the necessary space to fully explore the thoughts and feelings that exist in my heart and head. So I instead thought I would blog or write a note. So here goes.
Like many, I remember that Tuesday morning. I was in my first year of Divinity School at Duke. I had begun pursuing my Masters of Divinity only a few weeks before, beginning the process of becoming an Ordained Minister in the United Methodist Church. I had just finished up my early morning Old Testament Class with Stephen Chapman, when word started to spread that there had been a plane crash in New York. I thought how unfortunate that was and how crazy it must have been in such a populated place. As I walked into the student lounge, I found many of my classmates glued to the television that had been rolled in, watching as the events unfolded. As details came out, and we figured out what was going on, sadness and fear began to replace the shock. The rest of the day, classes were of course cancelled. At that point, having just started in a new place, I did not have a good group of close friends yet, so I retreated to my apartment. I lived alone my first year of school and after a brief conversation with a couple of people, including my parents, I literally sat in front of the television for nearly 18 straight hours, watching with horror with the rest of the world. I remember going to bed that night, keeping the television on in my bedroom, as image after image of the destruction and devastation filled the screen. I slept off and on, waking to those images, wondering if more was to come. I think that was probably the most scared I have ever been. Living by myself for the first time ever, in a new place, some four hours away from my family, I felt very alone. My thoughts about God were very similar. Where was God in all of this? Of course, that question would be answered in the days and weeks to come, as stories rolled in about the heroism of volunteers and witnesses, running to the aid of strangers, laying their lives down in the process. I was in the perfect place to be able to process the events that unfolded that day, a place that would not allow easy answers to float by, but rather a place that challenged me to my core to look at these events in the light of Christ and called for me to respond, not in a vengeful sort of way, but rather in a way that was quiet, deep and profound.
Meanwhile, the political figures began chiming in, presenting the country with their take on the events that had occurred. “This attack was an attack on Freedom, on Democracy, on our way of life.” “These Muslims had declared Holy War on the US.” Songs were written and performed, talking about waking up a sleeping giant and how the eagle of America would swoop in the destroy tyranny. And the United States declared a “War on Terror.” I remember hearing the line uttered by our President nine days later, “Either you are with us, or you are with the terrorists.” A line had been drawn in the sand. The problem with lines is that there are only two sides. Rarely, if ever, are there only two sides. As all of this unfolded, I remember thinking about how we, as Americans, were now living in the same world that many countries across the globe had been living in for a very long time. Terror was now our reality too. This of course led to an increase in attendance at churches across our nation. People flocked to hear a good word spoken, to hear their ministers preach inspiring messages that made some sense of the chaos that we now found ourselves immersed in. People were driven to the church by FEAR. What we have found since then, is that fear does very little to bring about true transformation in individuals’ lives. Instead, fear became a driving force behind many policies and procedures that would take hold in the world around us. This fear dictated to us that if we allowed our guard to relax just for a moment, another event like this would occur. We began giving up rights for the perceived ‘common good’, thinking that if we tightened security, we ultimately would become ‘safe’ again. ‘Security’, ‘safety’, ‘common good’ are all words I struggle to fully understand, especially in a Christian context.
So fast forward to last night. Uncharacteristically, I was awake at 10:20 on a Sunday night, but I was also flipping channels, which I never do anymore. I stumbled upon MSNBC and saw that the President would be addressing the nation. At first I just thought, ‘huh, that’s odd.’ But then the more I thought about it, the more something didn’t seem right. What in the world was going on? This couldn’t be good, right? Megan and I went back and forth on possibilities. She said, only half joking I think, “This feels like in the movies when the President addresses the country to tell us a huge asteroid is coming to destroy the earth.” As crazy as that sounded, the butterflies began to form in my stomach. I said, “It’s got to be pretty bad to not be able to wait until the morning, right?” I felt the same fear and trepidation that I did that night so long ago, as those images rolled across the screen of NYC. As the word began to trickle out, even before the President spoke, that, that Osama Bin Laden had been killed, relief began to set in. Another catastrophe was not to be reported this night, instead the death of a single individual brought about the media circus. I supposed I shouldn’t downplay it like that. Bin Laden was not just a single individual, but rather had become the face of the enemy in our ‘War on Terror’. But, after all, he is only one man.
I think what has shocked me more than anything else, and what has left me feeling odd, is the response that we have seen. Immediately Facebook statuses and tweets began pouring in, claiming victory and celebrating. Being a pastor, my newsfeed carried a fair number of cautionary words, reminding people of their Christian faith and words from the Bible concerning our enemies. Then came images of people dancing in the streets, waving flags, holding up signs. Here’s the thing, and I guess this is where the rub comes in; we have all watched images like these in the past come from foreign countries, many of whom are in the Middle East. And when we watched, we were absolutely disgusted by all of it. “How could they celebrate like that?”, we ask. But yet, there we were, as Americans doing the exact same thing.
In the days that will follow, I am sure that yet again the political figures will begin to spin this thing as they see fit. Already I have seen someone say that the ‘War on Terror’ is over and that we won. We will hear stories of sacrifice and images of 9/11 will come back to the screens of our televisions. Some will feel as if justice has been served. I am cautious in my desire to boast such a claim. And here is why: Jesus came to free us from the concept of Lex Talionis, which means, “Eye for an eye and tooth for a tooth.” You can find this idea in Matthew 5:38ff. While the Quran appears to re-establish such a claim for the Islamic Faith, the God whom I am called to serve and to love and who loves me has laid before me a different way, a way that is through peace, hope and love, a way that is through Jesus Christ, the author and perfecter of our faith. The question that keeps coming up in my mind is this: Can peace ever be truly accomplished through violence? I wrestle with this. Honestly, I do not know. And I struggle with this while living in a land that is free, and whose freedom was and is granted and protected through violence, so you can see the difficulties that I believe we all as followers of Christ must face.
So rewind one more time, back to my Divinity School days. At some point, I listened to my ethics professor Stanley Hauerwas say, “My world didn’t change at all on September 11th, instead, my world was rocked in 33 AD.” If that is the case, for you and for me, then the events of last night should pale in comparison to the celebration that we experienced a week ago, because it was early that morning that the real enemy, sin and death, was defeated once and for all. Thanks be to God for the Easter Season and for real reasons to celebrate.
